committed

CELEBRITY SEX TAPE now on DVD!!!

2012-02-14T08:12:00.001-08:00

The Asylum's scintillating and titillating valentine to us all - the hyper-sex-comedy Celebrity Sex Tape - is now on DVD everywhere.

Directed by MILF's Scott Wheeler, CST is bawdy, raunchy, gratuitous, crass and uncouth - in other words everything you want a sex comedy to be. So push away from the computer, my friends, and get thee to a DVD dispensary toot suite to procure yourself a copy.

BIGFOOT Pics in Entertainment Weekly!

2012-02-13T19:52:00.000-08:00

Been waiting on some official word on Bigfoot for a while now, and here it is, courtesy of Entertainment Weekly, you know, the largest entertainment magazine on the planet?!

I'll let the article explain itself, but suffice it to say, 6 words capture my excitement for this film: "Danny Bonaduce, Barry Williams, Sherilyn Fenn." More details as they're available...

observation notes: Celebrity Sex Tape

2012-02-13T08:13:00.000-08:00

The Asylum has really been upping their game in terms of sex comedies over the last few years, and by upping their game, I of course mean getting dirtier and dirtier. And continuing that tradition is Celebrity Sex Tape, the newest film from MILF director Scott Wheeler.

The set-up is simple enough: two college guys manage an invite to a saucy party where one of the dudes bangs a washed-up actress while the other dude films it on his phone. That video gets leaked online and goes viral practically overnight. When money problems work themselves into the scenario, what else are the guys to do other than join up with their friends and start marking porn?

In a genre where story isn't so much of an issue, the writers of CST manage to pull off a believable while fantastical plot, a real wet dream come true. My only complaint would be that it took seven minutes before we saw any actual nudity, but it was well-conceived and wildly-inventive, so totally worth the wait. Another plus: easily the coolest opening credit sequence in Asylum history.

Leads Jack Cullison (also the lead in MILF) and Jonathan Brett are well-matched and play to each others' strengths, Cullison an utterly likable everyguy and Brett the perfect slacker foil. Supporting players Colbert Alembert, Howard Cai and Andre Meadows round out a thoroughly funny cast. And then of course there are the ladies, including the hilarious Amanda Ward as the titular celebrity and the delightfully prudish Julie Barzman as Cullison's abstinent girlfriend, among many, many, many naked others.

All in all then, if you're looking for a raunchy, inventive and ridiculously lewd sex comedy, Celebrity Sex Tape will deliver the goods and then some. It's probably the raunchiest Asylum film to date. Consider the following NSFW exchange:

"I can't breathe!"
"My pussy's got all the oxygen you need!"

Nuff said, methinks.

2011 Loonies Winners!!!

2012-02-10T10:05:00.000-08:00

The call went out to designate the favorite films and performances from last year's Asylum productions, and you, the die-hard fans, responded in record numbers. So, without further adieu, your 2011 Winners of Looney Awards for Excellence in Asylum Films:

BEST DIRECTOR: Jared Cohn, Born Bad

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY: Alex Yellen, 2012 Ice Age

BEST CREATURES: Zombies, Zombie Apocalypse

BEST VISUAL EFFECTS: Battle of Los Angeles

BEST SCORE: Chris Ridenhour, Zombie Apocalypse

BEST SCREENPLAY: Jared Cohn, Born Bad

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS: AnnaMaria DeMara, 200MPH

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR: Gerald Webb, 2012 Ice Age

BEST ACTRESS: Bonnie Dennison, Born Bad

BEST ACTOR: Michael Welch, Born Bad

BEST PICTURE: Born Bad

So there you have it, your 2011 Looney Award Winners. Born Bad was this year's big winner, and the first Big 5 winner in Looney history - director, screenplay, actor, actress and picture. Congrats to Cohn and crew, as well as all the other Looney winners and nominees. 2011 was the best Asylum year yet, and 2012 is promising to be even better, so as I see it, we're all winners. Huzzah!

Before the Loonies are Announced, My Favorites of 2011

2012-02-09T09:44:00.002-08:00

With the Loonies being announced tomorrow, I thought before we find out what your favorite Asylum movies and performances of 2011 were, I'd share my personal favorites. Some of these might not be too surprising (anything Salem related), and some might (anything not Salem related), but nevertheless, here we go:

Favorite Director: Jared Cohn

Born Bad was just a different kind of Asylum movie, a more realistic thriller with no skimping on the sex, violence or suspense. The brainchild of Cohn, he shoulders the credit for this taut thriller.

Favorite Cinematography: Alexander Yellen, Born Bad

This was maybe the closest category for me, as Dragon Crusaders was one of the more epically beautiful direct-to-DVD films I saw last year, but there's just something about the look to Born Bad that really made it stand out.

Favorite Creature: Witch Ghosts, A Haunting in Salem

I don't need to explain my decision here, do I? I mean, I made these guys up. Witches who are ghosts, ghosts who are witches; can't go wrong. Just sayin'...

Favorite VFX: 2012 Ice Age

This was the big category this year, in my opinion, as 2011 was a year in which we saw Asylum VFX really kick it up a notch. But when all is said and done, it was the ice-swept devastation of 2012 Ice Age that blew me away the most.

Favorite Score: Chris Ridenhour, A Haunting in Salem

Another on I probably don't have to explain, but this isn't pure favoritism. In every review I read of Salem, whether positive or negative, they all raved about Ridenhour's beautifully brutal score.

Favorite Script: Craig Engler & Zombie Apocalypse

I think zombie movies ar epretty hard to pull off at this point, as they've been done - pardon the pun - to death. But Zombie Apocalypse felt fresh yet faithful to the genre.

Favorite Supporting Actress: Jenna Stone, A Haunting in Salem

Another no-brainer. Miss Stone sold this performance so well I hope I never meet her, because it will freak me out. Scariest performance of the year, certainly scarier than I wrote it. Awesomeness.

Favorite Supporting Actor: Gerald Webb, Battle of Los Angeles

2011 was Webb's year over at The Asylum, but of his various role, it was his work in Battle of Los Angeles that really stood out, mostly because that's the film in which we got to see the most of him.

Favorite Actress: Courtney Abbiati, A Haunting in Salem

Another no-brainer, but Ms. Abbiati's work here was out-of-the-park.

Favorite Actor: Bill Oberst Jr., A Haunting in Salem

Yet another, I know, but come on, you have to admit Bill got under your skin. Impassioned, creepy and capable of anything makes for an awesome anti-hero.

Favorite Documentary Feature: Anneliese the Exorcist Tapes

Devil-shit freaks me out. And this discovered-footage freak-fest was so intimidating to me I had to watch it in the afternoon, no joke. Frightening, frightening stuff.

Favorite Film: A Haunting in Salem

Duh. But really, how could any other film be my favorite. 3 Musketeers was a fun, hip action flick, Mega Python vs Gatoroid was campy-creature brilliance, Dragon Crusaders gave me a new appreciation for fantasy and Born Bad nailed it, but for me, the screenwriter of said-haunted-house movie, it just had ot be my favorite. Forgive me.

And don't forget to come back tomorrow to see what you guys chose as the best Asylum films of 2011.

Lovely Ladies of the Asylum: CELEBRITY SEX TAPE Edition

2012-02-08T08:13:00.000-08:00

In celebration of The Asylum's latest release, Celebrity Sex Tape, on DVD as of Valentine's Day, this time around the Lovely Ladies of The Asylum is dedicated to the talented women featured in this raunchy romp, including some familiar faces. You're welcome.

Julie Barzman - "Kim"

Amanda Ward - "Melony"

Born Bad, Invasion of the Pod People, Freakshow

King of the Lost World, Halloween Night et al

Jamie Bernadette

"Goth Chick"

MILF

Tammy Klein

"Born Again Actress"

MILF

Jenny Lin - "Gina"

Christine Nguyen - "Julian"

MILF

and Penthouse cover girl

Emily Addison as

inmate profile: Scott Wheeler

2012-02-07T08:14:00.000-08:00

With The Asylum's next release, the raunchy comedy Celebrity Sex Tape, less than two weeks away - it comes out Valentine's Day - I thought we'd take a look at the film's director, Scott Wheeler, a guy who has an extensive resume in and out of The Asylum.

Wheeler began his career in visual effects in the late 1980's, working on such projects as Xena, Space: Above and Beyond, Buffy and Millennium before segueing into films. In 2007, Wheeler became visual effects supervisor at The Asylum, a position he held for 23 films including Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus, Mega Piranha, Transmorphers and 100 Million B.C., just to name a few. In 2008 he directed for the first time: The Asylum's take on Jules Verne's Journey to the Center of the Earth; Wheeler also wrote that film's script. Journey marked the first of four films (to date) Wheeler has directed, and all for The Asylum: Journey, Transmorphers: Fall of Man, MILF and now Celebrity Sex Tape.

Bottom line, then, Celebrity Sex Tape is in the hands of a seasoned Asylum vet. And if MILF is any indication, we can expect a salacious but intelligent, horny yet heartfelt film from CST. Find out on the sweetest day of the year, February 14th, when the film hits DVD...

Only a Few Days Left to Vote for the Loonies!

2012-02-06T08:08:00.000-08:00

That's right, gang, there's still time to vote for your favorites in the 2nd Annual Looney Awards for Excellence in Asylum Films before the polls close on February 8th.

Who do you think was the year's Best Actor? Was it the ruthlessly vile psycho-boyfriend portrayed by Michael Welch in Born Bad? Or did you prefer the pipe-swinging, zombie-killing stoicism of Ving Rhames in Zombie Apocalypse? Who won you over more, Debbie Gibson or Tiffany? And what was the best Asylum film of the year? Was it A Haunting in Salem? Hmm? Hmmmmm?

The answer to these and at least 8 or 9 other questions are all within your power to help answer. Simply visit the link above, peruse the nominees then email your list of winners to AsylumLoonies@hotmail.com before February 8th to have your vote count. Winners will be announced two days later, on the 10th, and my personal picks for the best of the year will be posted in-between, on the 9th.

If you've yet to see any of the nominees, all of The Asylum's 2011 output is now available on DVD, so get thee to a video outlet and remedy this oversight toot suite!

First Wave of 2 Headed Shark Attack Reviews Roll In

2012-02-03T09:19:00.000-08:00

It's only been out a few days, but already the reviews are rolling in for 2 Headed Shark Attack, and for the most part, they make me very happy (and by "very happy," I mean "over the fucking MOON"). Check them out:

Here's one from Dread Central.

Here's one from FearNET.

Here's one from the MTV Movie Blog.

Here's one from Horror News.

Here's one from Snark Critic Pop.

Here's one from Dan's Movie Report.

Here's one from Freddy in Space.

Here's one from Gutmunchers.

Here's one from Guts & Grog.

Here's one from That Horror Site.

And here's one from Rock 102 Online.

Plus, an interview with Carmen Electra from Playboy in which she discusses the film, and an interview with Gemmy, the 2 Headed Shark, from The Smoking Jacket.

I'll keep updating this post as reviews roll in, and if you guy see any I miss, link to them in the Comments below. Oh yeah, and feel free to leave your own thoughts on the film!

COMMITTED EXCLUSIVE: A Conversation Between 2 Headed Writers Edward DeRuiter and H. Perry Horton

2012-02-01T08:12:00.000-08:00

For Committed's final post of 2-Headed Shark Week, I thought we'd host a conversation with the two men responsible for writing the film, Edward DeRuiter, who wrote the story, and H. Perry Horton (me), who wrote the screenplay. Outside of 2 Headed Shark Attack, Edward DeRuiter also wrote this year's 3 Musketeers mockbuster, in which he also acted in, as he did in Battle of Los Angeles. H. Perry Horton is best-known for penning A Haunting in Salem, and this blog. Two men, two writers, one two-headed shark. How did they do it? Let's see, huh?

P: How's this for a perfectly benign first question: How'd you come to work with The Asylum?

E: Well, about a million and a half years ago I was cast as one of the leads in a flick called The Source (which was later retitled The Surge). This was in the early days of The Asylum, and while they were already functioning as a distribution company for other people's films by then, The Source was one of their first forays into the production side of things. It was also one of my first feature film roles, and it was a crazy shoot. We filmed it in all in nine days nonstop, no off days and pretty much all in 120 degree heat. Unlike today where everything is shot on HD, this was shot on 35mm, so all of the camera setups took that much longer and you had even less time to shoot. We're talking serious indie pace back then, and everyone doing multiple jobs just to get it done. The Asylum senior partners (David Michael Latt, David Rimawi, Paul Bales) were all on set for every minute of it too, something that would be impossible for them today given how many projects the studio tackles at once. I think they got maybe 90 minutes of sleep a night between them. It was one of the most fun things I'd ever done in my life. And then I got paid on top of it.

I've done a few more films with them since then and have watched the budgets increase dramatically (and mercifully, the shooting days have increased too).

What about you? It's a big leap from being a cinephile and blogger about all things Asylum to writing a pair of movies for them. You can blog about The Dallas Cowboys too, but that doesn't mean they're gonna call you up and ask you to coach next Sunday's game...

P: New Years 2010, I'd had the blog up for about 4 months, and had been getting some positive feedback from The Asylum, creating a bit of a repoire, so I worked up the nerve to offer myself in whatever capacity they could use me. What I really wanted - my endgoal, as it was - was to write for them. A couple of days later, (Asylum partner Paul) Bales responded and gave me a chance to pitch. He'd been reading the blog - which at the time included a Potential Pitches regular feature - and graciously decided to give me a shot. The next day I received my first 3 pitch opportunities - the movies that would become Barely Legal, 3 Musketeers and 2 Headed Shark Attack. The first ended up going to Naomi Selfman, the other two to another writer (ahem). But a month or so after that, they came back to me wanting an idea for a haunted house movie, preferably one based on a true story. A few hours of internet research later, A Haunting in Salem was born.

I know it seems a little out of the blue that I was asked to pitch, and believe me, there have been a lot of (rejected) comments on my blog questioning my abilities, and though I never bother to retort by listing my qualifications, I will say it's not totally random that I'm here. I am a writer, and have been since I was 11. For better or worse, it's all I can do. And I love it, every second of it. And of everything I've dabbled in, writing direct-to-DVD genre films is the most enjoyable, and the most representative of who I am not only as a writer, but as a guy; again, for better or worse.

So long answer short, I got involved with The Asylum when they threw me a bone, which I then pounced upon like a wild, starving, rabid dog.

E: Ah yes, the harassment that writers get when the movie comes out. In defense of writers, a writer deserves a lot of the credit for a good script, but not a lot of the blame for a bad movie. People need to realize that just because you turn in a script doesn't mean they're going to film it as written (quite the opposite, really). On just about every feature film from the lowest budget indie to the biggest budget summer blockbuster, there are uncredited rewrites done by the producer, director, or in-house studio writers (not to mention production rewrites while filming) all which most of the time happen without the credited screenwriter being involved in the process. And that's all before they shoot the movie (which will be totally different from how the writer conceived it) and edit the movie together (which will be totally different from how the director conceived it). And even if it's the rare instance where the writer, director, and editor are all on the same page, you still have the producer - the person who bankrolled the entire project - who probably has a different take on how the movie should be, seeing as how they have to sell it and try to turn a profit. So guess who wins that creative tug-of-war?

In short, haters gonna hate.

P: Haters are indeed going to hate, and truthfully, having seen how people respond to B-movies online, I expected to be told how lousy I was. But you're right about the validation; I count myself luckier than I deserve everyday I wake up and these films exist. For me, I prefer to go with Kanye's frame of mind: "Screams from the haters, got a nice ring to it;" at least I got work out there for people to hate.

And I also agree with you about the path from script to screen. My role in this, ultimately, is small: I sit at home and write in a quiet room. It's not easy by any means, but it isn't as hard, in my opinion, as others' roles. Because from there, all these things I've put down on paper have to be made real, or as real as they can, and that takes a sort of coordination and organizational prowess I can't even wrap my head around. I just wrote the thing that became the movie, is all, and that's how I've been trying to think about it, because sometimes it's hard when your intent isn't translated as literally as you'd hoped. It's odd for me to watch the movies I've written, because I don't see the things that are there, I see the things that aren't, whether it's because they've been cut out or changed or because I left them out in the first place; sometimes I like these things, and sometimes they befuddle me a little, but I understand that my participation in the project is just the first rung in a tall ladder that includes contributions from dozens upon dozens of others, all of whom leave the thing a little different than they found it.

Regarding Salem's transition from script to screen, there were some lengthier explanations and stretches of exposition whittled down, altered or cut out, but in the end I was happy. Who am I kidding? I was beside myself with glee. I mean, it was my first produced script, and it all happened so fast - no more than five weeks from pitch to production - I'm just happy I didn't choke. I was so nervous, so distracted by trying to get everything about the story right, I don't think I realized they'd given me a chance to write the script before I was halfway done with it. But that process, getting the idea from pitch to script, that, to me, is the best part about the whole filmmaking process. I've been writing alone a long time. My work wouldn't see other eyes, if at all, until it was what I considered to be a final draft. So to have other people - development heads, directors, producers - giving their input from the germination phase all the way through to the final polish, that was rad. I felt like I was in a writer's band.

What about you? What were your thoughts on how 3 Musketeers wound up?

E: I think the big thing to remember is that the screenwriter on most movies is there to provide a rough framework for the filmmakers to then play around with. The script I turned in was a lot bigger in scope, characters were a lot more “grey” and there were a lot of carefully choreographed action sequences, which in hindsight I realize were never going to be filmed… But you’ve still got to put it in there. You’re asked to write a $100 million dollar movie and then THEY figure out how to realize it for less. The end result is that character motivations and relationships to one another change; scenes are rearranged, combined together, or deleted; new characters are added while others are cut; action set pieces are altered because of safety/cost/the laws of physics. Sometimes discrepancies do happen, and conveniently located items or characters can seemingly appear out of nowhere... BUT THIS HAPPENS IN EVERY MOVIE THAT HAS EVER BEEN MADE. As you said, the writer notices the differences because they're aware of the changes, but really all that matters is if the audience is entertained.

P: You mentioned you started out as an actor. At what point did writing enter your wheelhouse? Did you come to Hollywood an actor/writer, or is it something you developed after entering the industry?

E: Well I've always had stories I've wanted to tell so that's always been there in the background. I'd also been in enough films where I found myself thinking how I would have written them differently, so that was building to a head too. I'd say the straw that broke the camel's back though was really the current state of the Hollywood landscape - Movie stars are doing TV, TV stars are forced to take guest starring roles, and guest stars are lucky to get two lines now. So I started writing... and not only do they pay you for that, they throw you a part in this movie or that as a bonus. Had I known the secret to getting acting jobs was actually to be a writer, I'd have started a lot sooner.

P: Let’s talk about 2 Headed Shark Attack for a bit, what was the genesis of that idea?

E: The Asylum asked me to pitch a movie called 2 Headed Shark Attack. That was it, that was all the guidance I had: Three words and a number. Which means it was pretty open as to what I could do with it. I had a couple of different ideas, but I knew wanted to stay away from the beach community getting terrorized by sharks, which you see in 99% of these shark attack films. I don't want to see another one of those movies and didn't think anyone else did either.

One major problem with shark attack movies is that once the characters realize there is danger in the water, just don't go in the water any more... problem solved. So I had to figure out a way to a) give the shark legs, b) force the characters into the water for some reason, or c) take the land away from them. I was on the island of Penang in the Indian Ocean during the 2004 earthquake and tsunami and saw how far and how quickly the land can be covered by water, so the inspiration for the quake causing the island to flood came from there. A few days after the quake all manner of strange creatures were driven up from the deep and started washing ashore, so I knew I had to incorporate that too as you never see it in movies.

Another thing you never see in shark movies is electroreception (for those that don't know, sharks have a special organ in their head which lets them detect minute bioelectrical impulses given off by living creatures). This same ability makes sharks very susceptible to electric fields produced by machines, so obviously those both had to go in.

P: What about the characters, where did those come from?

E: I had originally wanted to use a small group of Navy Seabee’s as the heroes, basically a bunch of engineers and construction workers in uniform. The story would have been them MacGuyvering the island against the shark, brains against Brawn taken to the extreme. But a production note I was given early on was to ditch the military and try and get some scantily clad teens in there, so I figured a semester-at-sea ship loaded with college students was an organic way of doing this without it feeling tacked on. I dumped them on a deserted island out in the South Pacific in order to give them no one to turn to for help, not to mention it kept the cast small. After that, it was all about coming up with some unique ways to kill people, emphasizing the two-headed nature of the shark. The beast needed to do things that a one headed shark couldn't, otherwise it would just be a bit boring.

P: Soldiers become bikini wearing co-eds, probably for the best I think. Any other key differences from the original concept?

E: I had originally had an abandoned WW2 Japanese outpost on the island, which the kids would take refuge in during the flooding but which the shark would also find its way inside of as well. After having the shark annihilate people outdoors for the whole movie I thought it might be fun to put a shark indoors for the finale, the last place you'd expect to find one. Sadly this would necessitate the construction of a floodable soundstage, and that would have sent the budget skyrocketing. So it had to go.

By this point we had a pretty solid treatment going when it was turned over to you to handle the big task of actually writing the thing. What was that process like?

P: The first thing they had me do was adjust how the island came to be underwater. You had written the treatment before last year's Japanese earthquake; owing to sensitivity issues, they didn't want the island to be flooded because of an earthquake or tsunami. So all I could think to do was sink it, which meant adjusting it from an island to an atoll, which doesn't sound like much, but structurally it changed things. There were some elements of scientific mumbo jumbo attending to just how and why the atoll was sinking (which mercifully were cut before production; science ain't my strong suit), things like that to tweek.

The second thing I had to alter before I could start writing - which you've already mentioned - was the WW2 Japanese outpost. Interiors were going to be too costly, so I had to adjust the setting to a seasonal fishing camp, abandoned at the time our characters discover it. This actually changed a lot: all scenes had to be reset, which meant reestablished with their own context and backstory, character reactions et cetera, new things had to be explained and utilized, but this only took a few exchanges, and three or four days after getting the treatment, I started writing the script.

E: Yeah, my treatment involved a tsunami flooding the island, but this was about a week before the Japanese quake and tsunami. It validated the concept for sure, but given that one of the big markets for Asylum moves is Japan, it's best to play it safe. I don't know what other choice you really had than to sink the island. And I hear you on the technobabble, I'm not a big fan of it either and roll my eyes whenever I hear it. But if one of the production notes is to add more "science mumbo jumbo" as you put it, it's going in the script. The only real option is if you write it or if someone else does.

P: Once I got into it, things went well. The only real struggle I had was with the number of characters. Dumping people on a South Pacific Island (or Atoll) should have meant a small cast, but there was a need to justify the existence of the semester at sea, so six or eight kids weren't going to cut it. So I threw in, like, a dozen more, which gave up plenty of bodies in the end, but called for establishing a plethora of different personalities; it was a lot like juggling, only with 20 flaming bowling pins instead of three. But overall, writing this was - for lack of a better word - easier than Salem had been, both because I wasn't as nervous, and because I really wanted to write this movie. Shark movies are my favorite sort of movie, always have been, and it was a dream of mine to write one. Odd dream, I know, but it is what it is; I fucking love shark movies, and I wanted to be a part of the canon. So writing this script was fun for me, but more than that, it was important to me. And I feel like even though it was based on your story, I got a lot of myself in there, a lot of what I think makes a good shark movie, the suspense, the surprise, the hopelessness of going up against something so primal, the uselessness of all our distinctive attributes - strategy, communication, technology - when it's just you and the beast in the water, the fierce intelligence of sharks, their sheer evolutionary superiority...

From there it was the usual routine: notes from producers, notes from the director - the majority of these were practical things once locations were arranged - until production started and put an end to my involvement. I was intrigued to see how the story had changed from your treatment to my script and my first draft to my final, just as I was intrigued to see how the film itself varied from that draft. I think in this initial phase of my career I'm just absorbing everything I can, trying to inform the next script with the things I've learned from those before it, both about the process and about how to tell a good and effective story in this medium. It sounds hokey, and perhaps a tad arrogant, but I really do want to be the best damn B-movie writer in film history, or at least the best I can be. I just want to write fun, thrilling, chilling, interesting, hair-raising and imagination-stretching yarns for the masses. If I can fashion a living doing that, I'll be perfectly happy all of my days.

E: I know that another big change from my version of the story and the end product was flipping the gender of one of the protagonists from male to female, which cut out not only romantic tension with the heroine and altered the conflict with a male bully character, but undoubtedly created a lot of other changes in the cascade. I'm curious to know what some of those changes were and how you handled them.

P: Flipping "Dan" to "Dana" was another significant change. The biggest effect of this was, as you said, the elimination of the primary romantic tension. I tried to work a slighter, nerdier sort of relationship between Dana and Paul, but that didn't really make the final cut other than a few awkward glances, which I don't mind. While it's a tried and true staple of this sort of film to have two of the characters emerge from this uber-intense experience with romantic feelings, given the sheer number of characters in the film, not to mention that it takes place over the course of one day, there wasn't a lot of room for backstory so any romantic subplot I pushed would have come off as hackneyed. It was one of those, "if I can't do it right..." situations.

The bigger adjustment for me was the elimination of the good-guy student lead. For every bully there's a geek, for sure, and we have that in Paul, but in the best social structures there's also another male outsider who isn't as weak as the geek, though not as strong as the bully, but blessed with enough intelligence and brawn to come off as formidable. That's who Dan was supposed to be, and that guise didn't really fit on Dana. That's where "Kate" (Brooke Hogan's character) stepped into a bigger role, taking on the bravado that Dan would have had, the stand-offish swagger. This also changed the structure of the leads from a pair to a trio, which was something I really liked, because it gave me a chance to define the leads based on their specific group dynamic, Kate as the muscle, Paul as the brains and Dana as the heart. I think in the film these attributes and actions have been spread out among other cast members to give things a more ensemble feel, which given, again, the sheer number of characters, is perhaps a more balanced solution.

E: It's funny that you mention changing the structure of the leads from a pair to a trio, because a heroic trio was always my intent. I had also tried to incorporate a number of character flaws into Dan/Dana that if anything made him the weakest link in the team at times, which I thought was an interesting thing to do. I'm also a huge fan of playing with expectations, and in these sorts of films it's often the nerd character who comes up with the plan to save the day and gets killed by the monster at the end, while the male and female leads get to live on and presumably make uber-babies to defend against future attacks from the monster... And I just hate that, so from moment one I knew Paul had to survive.

P: I sensed that nerd-hero element in your treatment, and I think that it survived through my final draft, and to a certain extent it is apparent in the film. Other tweaks to other characters might have softened the edge of this a little, but in my head, Paul is as much a hero as this story gets.

The biggest cascading effect of these changes, to me at least, was that it altered how I looked at the script: what had been something I was envisioning as character-driven now became creature-driven: there were a lot of people and not a lot of time with them so aside from surface attributes and a few deeper delvings into the leads, you weren't going to get a lot of non-panicked interaction between them. The script then became about the situation, the shark, and he became my lead, the people my supporting chum. There are, after all, more deaths in 2 Headed Shark Attack than all four Jaws films combined. That didn't leave a lot of time for much more than killing, so it was only right that I come at it from the point of view that the shark was my lead. It's his name in the title, after all.

So knowing what we know now, what advise would you offer budding B-movie screenwriters?

E: It's not your script. I keep saying that but it's really important to get this across. You sold it and it belongs to someone else. Distance yourself from that emotionally and don't argue the notes. The changes are going in there one way or another, so just smile and say "yes sir, yes sir, three bags full".

Jump the gun. You are going to have a shockingly brief amount of time between getting the greenlight to start writing and when the first draft will be due, so you need to start writing ahead of time. I recommend outlining the hell out of it if you can. One page outline, then three pages, then ten pages, then 25 pages. Your 25 pager should have already have all of your scene headings as well as loose dialog and action, so you can turn it into 100 pages lickety split. Make your action not tied to location. At the speed indie films move at they just don't have the time, so keep it quick and light and don't make anything dependent on specific location details. The action involves a room with exposed pipes in the ceiling? Your hero low crawls down a long glass hallway? Those location details probably won't be available assets to the film crew, so not only did you waste your time writing it, but you waste the director's time coming up with a workaround on the day of filming, time they could otherwise be using to make the movie.

You?

P: Let's see, first off I'd say know your market. If you're writing a shark film, watch other shark films to make sure you're not rehashing material or treading on too familiar territory. Just like a novelist has to read, a screenwriter has to watch. I watched a steady regimen of shark movies while writing 2 Headed, and it paid off: one night, well into the second draft, I watched Sharktopus and realized I had used a line similar to one of theirs at a climactic moment. If I hadn't been versing myself in what else was out there, I would have made a huge (unintentional, I swear) kerfuffle.

Second - and this is branching off your Work Ahead tip, which I 1,000% support and endorse - know your characters. The pitch and treatment processes happen fast - real fast - and the one element that isn't naturally included is extensive character work; you're on your own there. The second I send off a pitch, the very next thing I do is go back and expand the characters, figure out who exactly they are, beyond surface attributes and professions; I delve into their personalities and backstories, stuff that probably won't make it into the script, but will still serve to further my understanding of each character, making it that much easier to dive head first into the script.

And lastly, keep working even when you're not working. Since I finished 2 Headed, I've written 16 treatments, two spec scripts and 50+ pitches, all for myself, to both keep my practice sharp and to build a reservoir of material ready to develop. Writer's block doesn't really exist, I'm convinced, so long as you plan ahead, be it as a treatment, an outline, a notepad of random dialogue or even just an idea book to ensure you're never at a loss for words.

What about aspiring actors? What words of advice would you offer those looking to become the next mega shark slayer or alien defender?

E: No one wants to spend the next ten hours reading my extensive thoughts on the acting side of the business, but I can give you some advice on what to expect when you DO land a job on one of these movies.

1. The script? That's a guideline. Chances are it got rewritten between the time you got it and the time you shoot the scenes, and no one gave you the latest draft. So learn to memorize new lines VERY QUICKLY.

2. They shoot fast. You will have one or two camera rehearsals, then maybe two or three takes before moving on. So you will have very little time to get it right. Know your character well, make strong choices from the get go and keep working through any bloopers... They can cut around the gaff and it takes less time than starting from the top of the take again.

3. Be cool. Even on big budget movies, creative people are high strung and film sets are stressful places... On indie films it's much more so. The people you are working with have gotten two hours of sleep tops for the last week, and they're got two more weeks left to shoot after you're gone... The last thing anyone needs is attitude from an actor of any kind. You might not think you have attitude, but trust me, you do. Be the easiest person to get along with on the set. These productions use the same people over and over again, and given the choice between the greatest actor in the world who gets into arguments over how to do the scene or a regular joe who can do the scene without being a diva, guess who gets hired for the next movie?

P: So what's coming up for Ed DeRuiter? Acting? Writing? Branching out?

E: On the acting side, I'm back at work for The Asylum, this time in "Air Collision" due out March 27th. I've also got a guest starring role in a new Cinemax sitcom called "The Girl's Guide To Depravity" due out this spring, which is billed as "Sex and the City" but with young, hot women as the leads… It’s a very funny show. Then I’m back to playing it serious, this time opposite Sean Astin and Brendan Fehr in the feature film “Adopting Terror” for Lifetime which will hit later this year.

On the writing side, I’m developing a big sci-fi feature for the Asylum right now but the details are under wraps so I’m not allowed to say much about it. I’ve also formed a production company with some industry friends of mine; we’re pitching some series ideas around town right now and are also putting together our own sci-fi action thriller that we hope to film this summer.

What can we expect out of you in 2012?

P: I am one of those ridiculously superstitious people who don't like to talk about projects until they're sure-things, lest I jinx them, but I will say I have an iron or two in the fire and plan to write as much as people will let me in 2012. And then probably a little more.

E: Great, now you've got me all paranoid that I've jinxed myself by telling you what I'm up to. Thanks a lot Perry.

P: Umm-hmm. So where can people keep up with all things DeRuiter?

E: If you want to see some pictures of my ugly mug, you're always welcome to check me out on my official website edwardderuiter.com. I've been meaning to add a blog to the page, hopefully I can get to that sometime this decade. If you can't wait for that and need some brain nuggets ASAP, you can always follow me on twitter @edwardderuiter, provided you can handle how awesome my tweets are.

And of course, everyone should know that we can follow you on twitter @hperryhorton.

P: I can personally attest to how awesome your tweets are. And yes indeed that is my Twitter handle if you just can't get enough of the witticism of H. Perry Horton. Mostly it's me with a healthy buzz on talking about whatever movie I'm watching that night, but whatever, that's what Twitter's for, right? Other than that, I'm always here to receive your questions and blistering criticism.

So there you have it, Committed's ridiculously thorough conversation with screenwriters Edward DeRuiter of 3 Musketeers and H. Perry Horton of A Haunting in Salem. Their joint effort, 2 Headed Shark Attack, for which DeRuiter wrote the story and Horton the screenplay, is available on DVD and Blu-Ray RIGHT NOW.

First Details on ABRAHAM LINCOLN VS ZOMBIES!!!

2012-01-31T18:56:00.000-08:00

Man oh man is The Asylum putting together an awesome 2012 roster. Today we got the first cast, crew and plot details of the forthcoming classic Abraham Lincoln vs Zombies, and the biggest and best news among all this is that our illustrious 16th President will be portrayed - perfectly, if you ask me - by the one and only Bill Oberst Jr., ill-fated hero of A Haunting in Salem.

Joining Bill in unknown roles are my fellow UNC alum Jason Vail (Guiding Light, Celebrity Ghost Stories, Gut), a lady by the name of Baby Norman, and a fellow named Don McGraw.

Dig the plot: "While the Civil War rages on, President Abraham Lincoln must undertake an even more daunting task: Destroying the Confederate Undead."

I like it, it's simple and to the point. The script comes courtesy of Richard Schenkman - who's also directing - from a story by he, Karl Hirsch and Lauren Proctor. Schenkman is a seasoned director best-know for 2007's Man From Earth, a mind-bending sci-fi flick.

That's all there is for now, but as the film's release date creeps closer - May 22nd - rest assured there will be more gory goodness to come...

A Plethora of Asylum Teaser Trailers Hit the Web Today!!!

2012-01-31T16:37:00.000-08:00

So it seems with today's DVD release of 2 Headed Shark Attack, there also comes a spattering of new teaser trailers from our favorite independent studio, available on their homepage.

We get our first peaks at Celebrity Sex Tape (out 2/14/12), Grimm's Snow White (out 3/13/12) and at long last Nazis at the Center of the Earth, which looks, as expected, AWESOME (out 5/15/12).

Head over to the site and check out what your spring's gonna look like...

2 Headed Shark Attack Unleashed TODAY!!!

2012-01-31T08:12:00.001-08:00

Oh glory of glories: at long last, after months of nail-biting anticipation, rejoice oh World, because the instant cult classic 2 Headed Shark Attack is now available on DVD and Blu-Ray!

Granted, I'm a little biased as to the sheer awesomocity of this film, having written it for director Christopher Olen Ray off a story by Edward DeRuiter, but don't let my thoughts sway you one way or the other, get out there right now, procure a copy and see for yourself!

If you use Redbox, go here.

If you use Netflix, go here.

If you want to own this seminal shark film, go here, or The Asylum store.

However you get your hands on it, get your hands on it; you don't want to be the last one on your street to see THE GREATEST 2 HEADED ANYTHING MOVIE EVER.

Are you still here? Go! Go!

New Asylum Title: ABRAHAM LINCOLN VS ZOMBIES!!!!!

2012-01-25T16:34:00.000-08:00

There's really nothing more to this post other than the title and this first-wave poster right now, but The Asylum is currently in the Peach State filming this awesomely-titled masterpiece, an obvious tie-in to Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter.

Can this be anything less than utterly outstanding?

(No. The answer is no.)

A Truly Worth Cause...Help An Inmate

2012-01-25T12:12:00.000-08:00

It isn't often I use this blog to ask for something, but that's how I'm using now, and for a very, very worthy cause.

Actor Jon Kondelik, who recently appeared in The Amityville Haunting, had a horrific FX-related accident in December that left him missing three full fingers and half the index finger on his left hand. Jon - whose brother James is also an Inmate, editor of 200MPH, Zombie Apocalypse and A Haunting in Salem - is now recovering, but is in need of new fingers, and so has set-up this Facebook page to elicit donations for the costly prosthetics.

I've been following this saga on Facebook since it happened, and I can honestly tell you the resiliency and positivity I've seen coming from Jon and James, not to mention the outpouring of support from others, has been nothing less than inspiring. And so I am humbly asking all my readers to spread the word throughout their social networks - link to this blogpost, share his Facebook page on yours, Google+ it, pass out fliers, text everyone you know - so that we can help raise the money Jon needs. Donations can be made here, and anything you can give I'm certain is greatly appreciated.

Being a fan is about showing your support, so let's get at it, my fellow faithfully-committed, spread the word wide and far...

First 2 Headed Review, and It's Grrrrrreat!!!

2012-01-25T08:15:00.000-08:00

Coming from the mouth and mind of Scotch over at Rock102 online, the first review of 2 Headed Shark Attack - on DVD next Tuesday - has hit the web, and man is it good!

And coming from Scotch, a fellow Asylum-fan-freak, this is high praise indeed! Find out for yourself next Tuesday!

My 5 Favorite (Single-Headed) Shark Movies

2012-01-24T08:10:00.000-08:00

As we enter day two of what I'm dubbing "2 Headed Shark Week" - leading up to next Tuesday's DVD release - I thought I'd share something I've been asked about a lot lately: my 5 favorite shark movies (that I didn't write). Now, if you're a regular reader of Committed, or you read me yesterday, you know that I LOVE shark movies. I have seen every shark movie in existence multiple times, my favorite movie ever is a shark movie (see below), I haven't been in the ocean past my ankles since 1984, and the good lord willing, I never will be again. Bottom line, shark movies mean a lot to me, and these are the cream of the crop, in my book.

Jaws: Where else would you start? Not only do I consider Jaws to be the no-brainer best shark movie, and the best horror movie, it's also my favorite film of all time. I watch it purposely at least twice a year and stop what I'm doing every time I come across it on TV. I know every scene, every line by heart; this, to me, is cinematic perfection. There will never be another shark movie like Jaws, there can never be; like the beast it depicts, the film is top of the food chain, an apex predator that will always devour the competition.

Shark Swarm: This 2008 TV miniseries from director James A. Contner and writers David Rosiak and Matthew Chernov is a staple of every SyFy shark marathon, and rightfully so. It's a shark movie lover's dream: a really long shark movie! This one hits all the high notes of a Saturday Afternoon Classic: greedy suit-type, toxic chemicals, scores of enraged, altered and organized sharks, not to mention a top-notch cast including Darryl Hannah, John Schneider, Heather McComb, Armand Assante and Academy Award Winner F. Murray Abraham. Put it all together and you get 167 minutes of bloody bliss.

Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus: Of course this was going to make my list. There are a lot of giant shark movies out there, but for those of us for whom this wasn't quite enough, The Asylum gave us a shark that was truly mega. Homeshark grabbed planes from the sky, ripped out a chunk of the golden gate bridge, and survived both a giant octopus and Lorenzo Lamas. It's a thrilling B-movie epic, the kills and effects are awesome, it made a household name of Debbie Gibson again and at the end of the day, it might just be the most fun shark movie ever made. (For now...)

Spring Break Shark Attack: I cannot believe it took so long for someone to come up with this concept. Spring Break. Shark Attack. They're like the peanut butter and chocolate of horror movie elements. And though this too was made for TV - CBS at that, go figure - so it can't be as gory as I'd like, it's another fun flick with lots of bikinis, lots of tanned bro's, and lots of sharks.

The Reef: Australians know sharks. Well. The Great Barrier Reef is Great White central. So it stands to reason a shark movie from an Australian would be pretty good. The Reef, by Australian Andrew Traucki, is that movie. Like Open Water with balls, the tension in this one never lets up. If you still dare to go in the water, this one just might shake that conviction once and for all.

UPDATED RE-POST: A Comprehensive List of Shark Movies ... Just Cuz

2012-01-23T08:12:00.000-08:00

There's nothing I like more than a good (or bad) shark movie. They scare the crap out of me, always have, ever since the questionable parenting of my father plopped me down in front of Jaws when I was about seven. Thus was born a primal fear/obsession that has only grown as the decades have passed. I've since seen Jaws more than 100 times, and every other shark movie I could get my hands on at least twice. Awesome, okay, terrible, shitty - it doesn't matter, they had me at "shark." And so when I started thinking about The Asylum's 2 Headed Shark Attack - out 1/31/12 from director Christopher Ray, based on a story by Ed DeRuiter and a script by me and starring Carmen Electra, Charlie O'Connell and Brooke Hogan, whew! - being the latest entrant of this distinguished canon, I decided I wanted to see a comprehensive list of shark films. But there wasn't one. So I made one, chronological to boot. I should clarify: these are movies with sharks as the primary antagonist, not just any old movie in which a shark swims by. That said, if I've left anything out, let me know on the comments board and I'll rectify the error. Enjoy!

Shark! (1969)

directed by Sam Fuller
written by Sam Fuller and John Kingsbridge
starring Burt Reynolds

Jaws (1975)

directed by Steven Spielberg
written by Peter Benchley and Carl Gottlieb
starring Roy Scheider

Mako: The Jaws of Death (1976)

directed by William Grefe
written by William Grefe and Robert W. Morgan
starring Richard Jaeckel

Shark Kill (1976)

directed by William A. Graham
written by Sandor Stern
starring Jennifer Warren

Tintorera (1977)

directed by Rene Cardona Jr.
written by Rene Cardona Jr
starring Susan George

Cyclone (1978)

directed by Rene Cardona Jr
written by Rene Cardona Jr
starring Arthur Kennedy

Jaws 2 (1978)

directed by Jeannot Szwarc
written by Carl Gottlieb and Howard Sackler
starring Roy Scheider

The Last Shark (1980)

directed by Enzo G. Castellari
written by Vincenzo Monnino
starring Vic Morrow and James Francisco

Jaws 3D (1983)

directed by Joe Alves
written by Richard Matheson and Carl Gottlieb
starring Dennis Quaid, Louis Gosset Jr, Lea Thompson

Jaws The Revenge (1987)

directed by Joseph Sargent
written by Michael De Guzman
starring Lorraine Grey, Michael Caine, Mario Van Peebles

Night of the Sharks (1988)

directed by Tonnino Ricci
written by Tito Carpi
starring Treat Williams

Mission of the Shark (1991)

directed by Robert Iscove
written by Alan Sharp
starring Stacy Keach

Deep Blue Sea (1999)

directed by Renny Harlin
written by Duncan Kennedy and Donna Powers
starring Thomas Jane, Saffron Burrows, Sam L. Jackson

Shark Attack (1999)

directed by Bob Misiorowski
written by Scott Devine, William Hooke
starring Casper Van Dien, Ernie Hudson

Shark Hunter (2001)

directed by Matt Codd
written by Sam Wells
starring Antonio Sabato Jr.

Shark Attack 2 (2001)

directed by David Worth
written by Scott Devine, William Hooke
starring Thorsten Kaye

Shark Attack 3: Megalodon (2002)

directed by David Worth
written by Scott Devine, William Hooke
starring John Barrowman

Red Water (2003)

directed by Charles Robert Carner
written by J.D. Fiegelson, Chris Mack
starring Lou Diamond Phillips, Kristy Swanson

Dark Waters (2003)

directed by Philip J. Roth
written by Philip J. Roth, Brett Orr
starring Lorenzo Lamas

Shark Zone (2003)

directed by Danny Lerner
written by Sam Parish
starring Dean Cochran

12 Days of Terror (2004)

directed by Jack Sholder
written by Jeffrey Reiner
starring Colin Egglesfield, Johnathan Rhys-Davies

Open Water (2004)

directed by Chris Kentis
written by Chris Kentis
starring Blanchard Ryan, Daniel Travis

Megalodon (2004)

directed by Pat Corbitt
written by Gary J. Tunnicliffe, Stanley Issacs
starring Leighanne Littrel

Shark Attack in the Mediterranean (2004)

directed by Jorgo Papavassiliou
written by Roland Heep
starring Ralf Moeller

Blue Demon (2005)

directed by Daniel Grodnik
written by Brett Thompson
starring DeeDee Pfieffer

Hammerhead (2005)

directed by Michael Oblowitz
written by Kenneth M Badish
starring William Forsythe

Raging Sharks (2005)

directed by Danny Lerner
written by Les Weldon
starring Corin Nemic

Spring Break Shark Attack (2005)

directed by Paul Shapiro
written by James LaRose
starring Shannon Lucio

Shark Swarm (2007)

directed by James Contner
written by David Rosiak, Matthew Chernov
starring Darryl Hannah, John Schneider

Sharks in Venice (2007)

directed by Danny Lerner
written by Les Weldon
starring Stephen Baldwin

Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus (2009)

directed by Ace Hannah
written by Ace Hannah
starring Lorenzo Lamas, Debbie Gibson

Malibu Shark Attack (2009)

directed by David Lister
written by Keith Shaw
starring Peta Wilson

Dinoshark (2010)

directed by Kevin O'Neill
written by Frances Doel
starring Eric Balfour

Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus (2010)

directed by Christopher Ray
written by Naomi Selfman
starring Jaleel White, Robert Picardo, Gary Stretch

Sharktopus (2010)

directed by Declan O'Brien
written by Mike MacLean
starring Eric Roberts

Swamp Shark

directed by G.E. Furst
written by Eric Miller & Charles Bolan
starring Kristy Swanson, DB Sweeney, Robert Davi

The Reef (2011)

directed by Andrew Traucki
written by Andrew Traucki
starring Adrienne Pickering

Shark Night 3D (2011)

directed by David R. Ellis
written by Will Hayes
starring Sara Paxton

2 Headed Shark Attack (2012)

directed by Christopher Ray
story by Ed DeRuiter, screenplay by H. Perry Horton
starring Carmen Electra, Charlie O'Connell

Sand Sharks
directed by Mark Atkins
written by Cameron Larson
starring Corin Nemic, Brooke Hogan, Vanessa Lee Evigan

Supershark
written and directed by Fred Olen Ray
starring John Schneider, Jimmie Walker, Sarah Lieving, Shane Van Dyke, Gerald Webb, Dylan Vox, Ashley Carr, Erica Duke, Harmony Blossom and a whole host of other Asylum reg's

Dark Tide
written by Ronnie Christensen and Amy Sorlie
directed by John Stockwell
starring Halle Berry, Oliver Martinez

Grimm's Snow White Gets a Poster!

2012-01-20T10:17:00.000-08:00

One of The Asylum films I'm really looking forward to this year is Grimm's Snow White, from screenwriter Naomi Selfman (Mega Python vs Gatoroid) and director Rachel Lee Goldenberg (Sherlock Holmes), two of my favorites.

A dark twist on the classic fairy tale, this one promises evil queens, reptilian monsters and hot chicks with bows and arrows. And now, behold the poster:

Looking at the creatures, they come off as pretty rad, and I like the fact that Snow White hasn't been cast traditionally, as a brunette, but rather as an "Alice in Wonderland" look-a-like. You definitely know you're in for a unique interpretation.

The film, starring Jane March, Jamie Thomas King and Eliza Bennett, hits DVD shelves on March 13th.

First Stills and Poster From American Battleship! Van Peebles! Weathers! Really Big Guns!!!

2012-01-19T13:40:00.000-08:00

Today, The Asylum released the poster, and on their Flickr page the first production stills, from their upcoming alien-naval skirmish/Battleship tie-in, American Battleship. From the look of things, we've got ourselves a full-blown action epic on our hands.

The film - written and directed by Thunder Levin, who penned last year's awesome 200MPH - boasts a powerhouse cast including Mario Van Peebles (New Jack City, Full Eclipse, BAADASSSSS) and Carl Weathers (Rocky, Predator, Happy Gilmore), as well as the lovely and surely talented Johanna Watts. Furthermore, the announcement gives us a little more details as to the film's plot: "Johanna Watts (left) plays Navy Lieutenant Caroline Bradley, who along with Mario Van Peebles and Carl Weathers, must use the United States last remaining battleship to fight an elusive and powerful enemy that threatens the entire planet."

Pretty rad, if you ask me. Especially since they used a real battleship, the U.S.S. North Carolina, and filmed in that same state, Wilmington, to be precise, which also happens to be the state I was born and raised in. So, count me doubly excited: a new Asylum flick, and bringing more entertainment jobs to the Old North State.

American Battleship hits DVD and Blu-Ray on May 15th.

inmate profile: Carmen Electra

2012-01-19T09:48:00.000-08:00

Up next in Commited's spotlighting of the cast for 2 Headed Shark Attack, the lovely and talented Carmen Electra, who plays "Dr. Anne Babish" in the film.

I feel stupid explaining who Carmen Electra is, because everyone in the world knows who Carmen Electra is; it's like trying to explain the sky, or water, to people who already know what it is. But in case this is your first day on the internet, welcome, and here you go:

Carmen Electra is an entertainment icon and possibly the greatest thing Prince has ever done. He discovered her fronting an L.A. rap group, signed her and took her on tour during his NPG phase (if you gotta ask, you don't deserve to know). From there, Carmen leapt onto television screens worldwide in a little show you might have heard of called Baywatch. Yeah, that one.

From there girlfriend pretty much just blew up and became an instant fixture in the global cultural consciousness. Movies, TV, hosting gigs, workout videos, calenders, a Playboy photo-shoot - Carmen Electra has done it all and keeps rocking out. Dig a list of her accomplishments: Good Burger, Singled Out, Scary Movie, The Simpsons, King of the Hill, Starsky and Hutch, Monk, Dirty Love, American Dad, Tripping the Rift, Date Movie, Epic Movie, Disaster Movie, Reno 911 and now the crown jewel of her filmography, 2 Headed Shark Attack.

Be sure to check her out in all her beautiful, shapely glory on January 31st, when 2 Headed Shark Attack swims onto DVD (oh yeah I did.).

inmate profile: Charlie O'Connell

2012-01-17T08:10:00.000-08:00

The 2 Headed Shark Attack profile machine rolls on, this time spotlighting the film's male lead, the one and only Charlie O'Connell, a.k.a. "Captain/Professor Franklin Babbish."

A native New Yorker, Charlie O'Connell started acting in the late 1990's with a few roles in television - including a 19-episode stint on "Sliders" in which he played the brother of his real-life brother, Jerry O'Connell - but it was 1999's Cruel Intentions that marked the beginning of his film career. Since then, O'Connell has appeared in such films as Dude, Where's My Car? The New Guy, Devil's Prey, Kiss the Bride and one of my modern creature-feature favorites, Kraken: Tentacles of the Deep. If you're a lady or in a relationship, you might also remember O'Connell from a season of "The Bachelor" a few years ago, in which he was, obviously, The Bachelor.

For my money, O'Connell's perfect to play Babish: calmly capable, sharp and ruggedly frayed at the edges, knowledgeable without pretense; in other words, a good, honest, solid everyman, exactly the sort of guy you want to call Captain. See for yourself what all the buzz is about on January 31st when 2 Headed Shark Attack hits DVD, Blu-Ray and Digital.

inmate profile: Brook Hogan

2012-01-16T08:09:00.000-08:00

We start our cast profiles for 2 Headed Shark Attack - on DVD January 31st, tell everyone you know - with rising starlet Brooke Hogan, for whom 2 Headed Shark Attack is her first (U.S. debuting*) film.

As if you didn't know, Brooke Hogan is the eldest child of famed wrestling icon (and, along with Scooby-Doo and Batman, one of my childhood heroes) Hulk Hogan, but started coming into her own fame in 2005 with the airing of her family's reality TV show, Hogan Knows Best. An instant media darling, Brooke has since branched into her own show, Brooke Knows Best (no longer airing) and two pop/dance/whatever-the-kids-are-calling-it albums, 2006's Undiscovered and 2009's The Redemption. Flo Rida's on that second joint. I hear clubs can't even handle that dude, so, score.

It was only a matter of time before Miss Hogan forayed into acting, and how fortuitous that her first role, as "Dana" in 2 Headed Shark Attack, is destined to be a cult classic. Besides this film, and another shark film with Asylum ties I give info on after the asterisk below, Brooke has also been cast in a cannibal-high-school-thriller, Devour, which also has Asylum ties: her co-star is David Chokachi of Born Bad and 3 Musketeers.

No doubt 2 Headed Shark Attack will be the launching point of what is likely to be a lively and lasting film career. A classic blonde with sass and intelligence will always do well, and Brooke Hogan proves herself rife with all of these attributes in 2 Headed Shark Attack, on DVD - can you tell I really want you to see this film? Yeah, cuz I wrote the script - January 31st. Go tell it on the mountain.

*Brooke also stars in Sand Sharks, directed by the very formidable Mark Atkins (Battle of Los Angeles, Dragon Crusaders), but we're still waiting for a U.S. release on that one; Brit Committed readers, it's on DVD where you're at.

Just a Reminder: Don't Forget to Vote for The Loonies!!!

2012-01-13T10:22:00.000-08:00

2012: Fifteen Years of Asylum Greatness and Counting!

2012-01-12T09:12:00.000-08:00

A quick post here to acknowledge that 2012 marks The Asylum's 15th year in business, in which time they have produced 100 movies completely independently. How do I know this? A little poster The Asylum tweeted yesterday told me:

I'm pretty sure I'm going to be airbrushing that onto the side of a van real soon. I mean, dig it: Moby Dick, Mega Shark, Mega Python, Gatoroid, a Terminator, a Transmorpher, H.M.S. Titantic 2, a zombie that from here looks like Geoff Meed, a car going at least 200MPH and, oh yeah, a 2 headed shark. There's also a pretty rad accompanying video that hits on the company's highlights of the last 15 years that makes its debut on the 2 Headed Shark Attack DVD, out January 31st.

If this is what the last 15 years have given us, who can even conceive of how incredible the next 15 will be? 2012 is already shaping up to one of the busiest and most interesting years for The Asylum, and they've only revealed half a dozen flicks so far. As usual, come back here often for the lowdown on any and all things Asylum.

inmate re-profile: Director Christopher Olen Ray

2012-01-10T08:10:00.001-08:00

So, with only three weeks before the DVD release of 2 Headed Shark Attack, I thought it time we start shining the Committed spotlight on the creative personnel involved, starting with the man in the director's chair of this impending classic, one Christopher Olen Ray.

That's Mr. Ray on the left there.

Ray has directed twice before for the Asylum - last year's Mega Shark Vs. Crocosaurus with Jaleel White and this year's Almighty Thor with Richard Grieco - as well as twice before that: in 2008 he directed Reptisaurus, a made-for-TV movie starring Gil Gerard, and a series called "Road to Rhythm."

I've made mention here before of Mr. Ray's cinematic pedigree - his father is noted exploitation director Fred Olen Ray, who in more than thirty years of filmmaking has unleashed nearly one hundred titles, among them Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers, Evil Toons and Scalps. Ray honed his skills spending years as an assistant director, PA and coordinator on more than a dozen of his father's films, so you know he received a lot of firsthand, on-set training from a master of the field. In fact, C-Ray's still works as a first assistant director on occasion, most recently on two other Asylum films - A Haunting in Salem and Zombie Apocalypse - and also on an upcoming C. Thomas Howell film I've made mention of before, Camel Spiders.

Christopher Ray, therefore, is no stranger to the creature-feature game - as MSvC clearly and deftly proved - he is weathered, learned, and more than capable of delivering to us, the ever-expectant masses, simply one of the Greatest Shark Films of all time (please please please).

Decades from now when they mention the best B-Movies of the early 21st Century, I have every faith 2 Headed Shark Attack will be on the tip of every tongue, as well as the name of its director, Christopher Olen Ray. Watch the magic unfurl before your very eyes when the greatest story ever told hits DVD January 31st, 2012, only a few short weeks from now...

Air Collision Final Poster and First Trailer!

2012-01-09T17:11:00.000-08:00

Courtesy of the fine folks over at 28 Days Later Analysis, we have our first look at the final poster and initial trailer for The Asylum's next disaster flick, Air Collision. Owing credit where it's due, you should follow the link to see the trailer, but check out the poster below:

Air Collision - which stars Reginald VelJohnson, Jordan Ladd and Gerald Webb - is written and directed by Liz Adams, and streets March 27th, 2012

outside the walls: January DVD Releases

2012-01-09T08:12:00.000-08:00

So I'll admit it, there are films not produced by The Asylum. There always have been, always will be. These glasses I wear are not rose-colored. They are clear, and occasionally smudged with fingerprints. A sampling of non-Asylum films due soon and news that might spark the interest of Asylum fans. Just remember, Sweet 'n Low ain't Sugar.

JANUARY 3rd

Don't Be Afraid of the Dark

Don't Let Him In

Ice Quake

Red: Werewolf Hunter

Shark Night

JANUARY 10th

A Darker Reality

Killer Elite

JANUARY 17th

Cold Sweat

The Interceptor

JANUARY 24th

The Woman

JANUARY 31st

2 Headed Shark Attack

story by Edward DeRuiter

screenplay by H. Perry Horton (me!!!)

starring Carmen Electra, Brooke Hogan, Charlie O'Connell, Gerald Webb et al

Dream House

The Thing

A Look Ahead to Asylum's 2012...So Far...

2012-01-04T08:12:00.000-08:00

With The Asylum's 2011 slate of films all but behind us - I say "all but" because there are still the Loonies yet to determine the fan favorites of last year's crop - I thought this would be an opportune moment to take a look ahead at the films The Asylum has already announced for 2012, which so far include two mockbusters, a disaster flick, a sex comedy and two wholly original horror films; let's take a look:

2 Headed Shark Attack

screenplay by H. Perry Horton (A Haunting in Salem)
from a story by Edward DeRuiter (3 Musketeers)
directed by Christopher Olen Ray (Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus, Almighty Thor)

starring Carmen Electra, Brooke Hogan, Charlie O'Connell, Gerald Webb and a case of future household names

on DVD January 31, 2012

Celebrity Sex Tape

written by Jonny Haug, Pat Sheehan, Matt Short

directed by Scott Wheeler (MILF)

starring Jack Cullison, Emily Addison, Jonathan Brett

on DVD February 14, 2012

Grimm's Snow White

written by Naomi Selfman (Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus, Mega Python vs Gatoroid)

directed by Rachel Lee Goldenberg (Sherlock Holmes, Princess & the Pony)

starring Jane March, Eliza Bennett, Jamie Thomas King

on DVD March 13, 2012

Air Collision

written & directed by Liz Adams

starring Reginald VelJohnson, Jordan Ladd, Gerald Webb

on DVD March 27, 2012

Nazis at the Center of the Earth

written by Paul Bales (2010 Moby Dick, Legion of the Dead)

directed by Joseph Lawson

starring Dominique Swain, Jake Busey, Josh Allen

on DVD April 24, 2012

American Battleship

written & directed by Thunder Levin (script 200MPH)

starring Mario Van Peebles, Carl Weathers, JoHanna Watts

on DVD May 15, 2012

No 3,000 Followers, No Mega Shark 3...?

2012-01-02T20:13:00.000-08:00

Well, over the last month the fine folks at The Asylum had given we faithfully committed the chance of a lifetime - the chance to earn the greenlighting of Mega Shark 3, and all we had to do to was pump their Twitter followers up to 3,000 by December 31st...

...and we failed.

That's right, at post-time, @theasylumcc only had 1,543 followers, barely half of the number required. So as it stands, as there does not seem to be enough interest, there will be no Mega Shark 3.

I'm going to say that again, so the finality of its weight might reverberate inside your soul: there will be no Mega Shark 3.

Doesn't sound good, does it? Doesn't sound like any kind of world one would want to be a part of, does it? How could we have dropped the ball like this? How could we have gone bald-faced right up to this gift horse and stuck our heads into its mouth? That's a gross analogy, I'll admit, but what we have here is a gross mishandling of opportunity. 3,000 followers. In social networking terms, that's next to nothing. One person tells one person who tells thirty more who tell three hundred apiece and bada-bing! We got the final installment to the greatest marine trilogy of ALL TIME.

But now, alas, all is lost...

...or is it?

Probably, but Asylum partner David Michael Latt has issued the challenge that if @theasylumcc hits 2,000 followers by next Monday, they'll consider a third installment. No guarantees as before, but it is the tiniest sliver of hope, and sometimes, that's all you need.

So here's what we're going to do, gang: we're going to follow @theasylumcc on Twitter if we don't already; we're going to sign up for Twitter if we don't already have an account and follow @theasylumcc: we're going to take to said Twitter accounts and beg everyone who follows us to follow also @theasylumcc; we're going to repeat this begging on Facebook, Google+, our personal blogs and websites, any pertinent message boards we frequent, actual people met in the physical world et cetera until we acquire not only the 2,000 followers challenged to us, but then the extra 1,000 we were supposed to get the first time, because it's the right thing to do, and because it would result in a truly awesome movie; what further motivation do you need?

There is nothing rarer in life than a second chance; who would dare waste it?

The Asylum 2011: Ridiculously Popular

2012-01-01T16:54:00.000-08:00

The greatest website in the world, IMDB of course, published this morning its list of the 3, 759 Most Popular Video Titles of 2011, and man, is The Asylum all over it; let's put it like this - if The Asylum's 2011 filmography was a high school student, they'd be a handsome, intelligent quarterback. Twelve titles - that's not a typo, twelve - in the top 100 are Asylum titles, 4 in the top 10. Check it out:

#2 - The Amityville Haunting

#5 - A Haunting in Salem (!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

#6 - Dragon Crusaders

#10 - 2012 Ice Age

#19 - 200MPH

#21 - Barely Legal

#23 - 11/11/11

#24 - 3 Musketeers

#32 - Battle of Los Angeles

#36 - Born Bad

#48 - Anneliese: The Exorcist Tapes

#80 - The Princess and the Pony

Congrats to all the fine folks at The Asylum for the much-deserved recognition. And man, if 2011 was this good, I for one can't wait to see how 2012 plays out...

and the nominees are: Announcing the 2011 Loonies!

2011-12-28T07:59:00.000-08:00

That's right, Asylum fans, as another year draws to a close, it's time to look back over the last 12 months to determine our favorites among the year's harvest. I'm talking, of course, about the nominees for the 2nd Annual Looney Awards for Excellence in Asylum Films.

Invented by yours truly, the Loonies are an entirely fan-voted awards presentation across myriad categories celebrating the very best in The Asylum films of 2011. And this year has produced a lot of competition: 16 films hit DVD in 2011, up from 12 in 2010.

The deal is simple: below you will find nominees in 12 categories; all 16 films have been nominated for Best Feature (14 and 2, really, but you'll see), but in subsequent categories, the number of nominees drop, making those represented truly the creme de la creme. Write-in candidates are of course welcome.

The voting period will last for six weeks, giving you plenty of time to catch up on any films or performances you might have inadvertently missed, and will close on Wednesday, February 8nd, 2011. Winners will be announced right here two days later, on Friday the 10th.

So email your votes to AsylumLoonies@hotmail.com and let your voice be heard, nay, counted! All these fine films are available on DVD for your screening purposes, and all can be acquired by a quick trip to The Asylum site, or Netflix. Vote once, but vote wise: winners will receive the undying admiration of we the committed, plus the worldwide esteem and jealous respect of their peers that comes with being a Looney-Award Winning Actor, Actress, Writer, Director, Non-Human, et cetera.

Good luck to all of the nominees, and now, without further adieu, your 2011 Looney Nominees:

Best Picture

Mega Python vs. Gatoroid
The Princess & the Pony
200MPH
Barely Legal
Battle of Los Angeles
Almighty Thor
2012 Ice Age
A Haunting in Salem
3 Musketeers
11/11/11
Born Bad
Zombie Apocalypse
Ballistica
Dragon Crusaders

Best Documentary Feature
Anneliese: The Exorcist Tapes
The Amityville Haunting

Best Actor
Kel Mitchell...Battle of Los Angeles
Cody Deal...Almighty Thor
Richard Grieco...Almighty Thor
Patrick Labyorteaux...2012 Ice Age
Bill Oberst Jr....A Haunting in Salem
Xi...3 Musketeers
Michael Welch...Born Bad
Ving Rhames...Zombie Apocalypse

Best Actress
Tiffany...Mega Python vs Gatoroid
Debbie Gibson...Mega Python vs Gatoroid
Jeneta St. Clair...Barely Legal
Julie McCullough...2012 Ice Age
Bonnie Dennison...Born Bad
Taryn Manning...Zombie Apocalypse
Fiona Perry...The Princess and the Pony
Courtney Abbiati...A Haunting in Salem

Best Supporting Actor
Carey Van Dyke...Mega Python vs Gatoroid
Bill Oberst Jr....The Princess and the Pony
Gerald Webb...Battle of Los Angeles
Gerald Webb...2012 Ice Age
Hayden Byerly...11/11/11
David Chokachi...Born Bad
Gary Weeks...Zombie Apocalypse
Martin Kove...Ballistica

Best Supporting Actress
Cecily Fay...Dragon Crusaders
AnnaMaria Demara...200MPH
Jenna Stone...A Haunting in Salem
Lisa Younger...Barely Legal
Michele Boyd...3 Musketeers
Aurelia Scheppers...11/11/11
Meredith Monroe...Born Bad
Lesley-Ann Brandt...Zombie Apocalypse

Best Screenplay
Naomi Selfman...Mega Python vs Gatoroid
Mark Atkins...Battle of Los Angeles
Paul Sinor & Victoria Dadi...2012 Ice Age
Edward DeRuiter...3 Musketeers
Keith Allan & Kiff Scholl...11/11/11
Craig Engler & Brooks Peck...Zombie Apocalypse
Jared Cohn...Born Bad
Eric Forsberg...Almighty Thor

Best Score
Chris Ridenhour...A Haunting in Salem
Chris Ridenhour...Zombie Apocalypse
Chris Ridenhour...11/11/11
Chris Ridenhour...200MPH
Chris Ridenhour...3 Musketeers
Chris Ridenhour...Dragon Crusaders

Best Visual Effects
Mega Python vs Gatoroid
Zombie Apocalypse
2012 Ice Age
Dragon Crusaders
Battle of Los Angeles
Almighty Thor

Best Creature
Gatoroids...Mega Python vs Gatoroid
Mega Python...Mega Python vs Gatoroid
Zombies...Zombie Apocalypse
Witch-Ghosts...A Haunting in Salem
The Pony...The Princess and the Pony
Anneliese Michel...Anneliese: The Exorcist Tapes

Best Cinematography
Alex Yellin...200MPH
Mark Atkins...Battle of Los Angeles
Alex Yellin...2012 Ice Age
Alex Yellin...A Haunting in Salem
Mark Atkins...Dragon Crusaders
Alex Yellin...Born Bad

Best Director
Mark Atkins...Battle of Los Angeles
Shane Van Dyke...A Haunting in Salem
Keith Allan...11/11/11
Nick Lyon...Zombie Apocalypse
Jared Cohn...Born Bad
Cole McKay...3 Musketeers
Mary Lambert...Mega Python vs Gatoroid
Rachel Goldenberg...The Princess and the Pony

TWO New Asylum Flicks on DVD TODAY!!!

2011-12-27T08:11:00.001-08:00

For the first time maybe ever, today marks the release of not one, but TWO new Asylum movies on DVD: Zombie Apocalypse and The Amityville Haunting.

Zombie Apocalypse - written by Craig Engler and Brooks Peck and directed by Nick Lyon - is about pretty much what the title would lead you to expect: a group of survivors in a zombie wasteland try and fight their way to salvation. The film stars Ving Rhames, Taryn Manning, Gerald Webb, Lesley Ann-Brandt and scores more, and did right well in its World Premiere on SyFy back in October.

And then there's The Amityville Haunting, the latest found-footage project from the studio, this time concerning an ill-fated family that chose the wrooooong house to move into.

Both of these films are definitely worth a watch - Zombie Apocalypse boasts some of the best effects, writing and acting the studio's ever put out there, and Amityville Haunting will scare the living crap out of you, believe me. Jump to the links above for more info, including production stills and trailers, then go wherever you go to procure DVDs these days and get your hands on this fun and frightening double feature.

Celebrity Sex Tape Gets a Poster!!!

2011-12-26T19:15:00.000-08:00

Today the fine folks over at The Asylum revealed the poster for their next sex farce, Celebrity Sex Tape:

Pretty standard poster, white background a la all Asylum comedy posters, and plenty of titillating promise. In case you forgot, this is the premise:

A group of college nerds secretly record a washed up celebrity having sex and post the tape on the internet. When the publicity revives the actress's career, every B-list celebrity, reality show reject, and celebutante in Hollywood want to star in the guys next "production."

Rrrrrracy...the film - directed by Scott Wheeler (MILF) from a script by Jonny Haug, Pat Sheehan and Matt Short and starring Jack Cullison, Emily Addison, Jonathan Brett, Colbert Alembert, Howard Cai, Andre Meadows and Julie Barzman - hits DVD on February 14th, 2012, making it next year's perfect Valentine's gift.

observation notes: The Amityville Haunting

2011-12-23T13:17:00.000-08:00

There's nothing like a good scare for Christmas, I always say, and this year The Asylum has given us just that with The Amityville Haunting, on DVD this coming Tuesday, the 27th.

The studio's fifth found-footage film (behind Monster, Paranormal Entity, 8213 Gacy House and Anneliese: The Exorcist Tapes), this one is a collection of home movies from and featuring the Benson family, who early last year moved into a house where 20 years earlier, a man named Robert Defeo Jr. murdered his whole family by shooting them each in the head. You'd think your Realtor would be required to tell you stuff like that. Nope, not if it happened more than three years ago. This is why they make ghost detection apps for iPhone and Android; just sayin' people, you gotta learn to take some spectral responsibility...

Anywho, as I don't like to give away any spoilers in my notes, and as found-footage films are pretty much twist after twist after twist, anything specific you say is giving away something, so I will comment only generally. Think of the film like Anneliese meets Paranormal Entity, a family in conflict with a deeper, darker power than they could have conceived of. The footage is raw, gruesome in spots, and guaranteed to make you jump. Things move very quickly here - only a month after moving in was the Benson Footage discovered - and get real weird real fast; there's a lot of supernatural activity going on in this house - I'd tell you not to blink or you'll miss some of the subtler notes, but I don't think you'll be blinking much. My only advice is to remember to breathe, otherwise, you're gonna pass out like seven minutes in.

If I'm honest, found-footage films aren't necessarily my cup of tea, not because I think they're overdone or anything like that, I just like a little more story than most of them provide. But The Amityville Haunting has a tangible and engaging narrative running through it; the film does not feel like a patchwork of random yet similar events, but rather a skillfully sewn together storyline that mounts in intensity from the first frame to a gut-wrenching crescendo 90 minutes later. Whoever The Asylum got to arrange this one did a bang-up job.

So bottom line, if you enjoy found-footage films, or just horror in general, guaranteed The Amityville Haunting has something that will make you scream. It's a fast-paced, fright-filled story sure to generate some uncomfortable empathy with the afflicted Benson family. It will also teach you to bone up on the history of buildings you consider buying to store your family in, and to maybe not move to notoriously haunted towns. Again, just sayin'...

creature feature: Virginity

2011-12-22T09:54:00.000-08:00

In all Asylum movies, there is an enemy to be defeated. Sometimes that enemy is a monstrous creature running amok in a populous area; sometimes it's a crazed genius at the helm of a fiendish plot for world domination/destruction; sometimes it's a psycho or a supernatural being with a penchant for nubile women; sometimes it's an extraterrestrial lifeform or object whose arrival spells doom; and sometimes, in the cases of films like The 18 Year Old Virgin and Barely Legal, it is that most heinous of curses, the most affronting of affronts - your virginity.

In both these films - both written, by the way, by Naomi Selfman - and many other teenage sex comedies, virginity is a thing that must be slain, a thing to purge oneself of in order to insure normal, healthy personal development, and of course, lots of sex. In most creature features, this is the part where I would describe the creature in question, it's schematics and parameters, abilities and weaknesses; that's a little hard to do with virginity - it's just a thing about you that's there until it isn't, and getting rid of it, "killing" it, if you will, is relatively easy, depending on how you rate a variety of factors including appearance, willingness, standards and proximity to partners with comparable ratings. Yet it remains a hard and fast (pardon the pun) tenet of young adulthood: getting laid ain't easy. Even if, if 18 Year Old Virgin and Barely Legal are to be believed, you're a smoking hot chick.

In both films, women decide their still-intact virginities need to be done away with at the very first legal opportunity, their 18th birthdays. All sorts of sexy hi-jinks ensue in their quest to obtain a dong for the deed, and in the end, it's realized that sex and love, while of course highly compatible, can come separately with varying degrees of physical and emotional satisfaction. But they still hit it, so, problem solved.

Losing one's virginity, to some people, could be considered the most significant rite of passage there is; it certainly cannot be argued by anyone, no matter their beliefs, that it is one of the more intensely personal experiences a person can go through, and thus it is to be expected that pursuing this experience can sometimes reach fervent heights. That's why we have these movies, not to mention American Pie, The Last American Virgin, Losin' It, Porky's, Superbad, The Virginity Hit, Can't Hardly Wait, Twilight and, of course, The 40 Year Old Virgin. The conclusion? Virginity is to comedies as Nazis are to war movies: the ultimate villain.

Ooh, pitch idea: Virgins at the Center of the Earth, a sort of Vernesian Blue Lagoon/Land of the Lost thing about college kids on a church trip - the whole purity-ring crowd - whose bus falls into a crevice opened by a localized earthquake. Instead of dying in a fiery blaze as logic would dictate, they fall into an inner-earth paradise from which they can't escape. As the months wear on, the promises of the surface world fall away as passions flare. But you know, funny.

Sounds Like an Asylum Movie to Me

2011-12-21T08:10:00.001-08:00

The story here isn't so much the impetus for this post as much as the concept of the critter at the center of it is.

Seems down in the beleaguered Gulf of Mexico, shrimpers and oystermen are having a bit of a problem, and this time it isn't BP's fault: giant shrimp known as Black Tiger Shrimp are eating up their potential catches. Like I said, the story isn't the thing, it's this guy:

Okay, so, that fella, by the ruler he sleeps next to, is 12 inches long; imagine if those inches were feet. Then it isn't other shrimp this bad boy's chomping on, it's bigger fish, sharks, dolphins, small whales, small boats, personal watercraft and definitely every single human being it comes across. And oh yeah, they're not rogue creatures, they travel in schools. Current estimates are of 1,000 or more in the Gulf alone. So...yeah.

But how in the world would they evolve to such a size? That's just ridiculous.

That's where BP comes back into the picture. What if the oil spill was done intentionally to cover up another kind of spill? Say of some government-designed growth hormone meant to plump our seafood supplies into the 22nd Century? And say rather than the normal dose, a dose 1,000,000 times that was released into the ocean just as a school of Black Tiger Shrimp were swimming by? What do you suppose would happen then? TOTAL SHRIMPDEMONIUM!

So then the concept is sound, or sound enough for 90 minutes on SyFy, and now the only question is, who's gonna handle this shrimp problem? Shrimpers, of course, good old down-home boys, men of the marsh, stubbled hard drinkers with rock-solid work ethics and hearts of gold. You gotta have John Schneider in this one, you just gotta. And the dude who played Bubba Gump as his first mate, or whatever shrimpers call the right-hand guy. Throw in Lea Thompson as his wife, a teenage kid or two who's off with friends on a pleasurecraft when the shrimp attack, and you got yourself a freakin' movie.

As usual, dibs.

Asylum Should-Stars #13

2011-12-20T08:13:00.001-08:00

Here at Committed, I'm always looking for ways to prolong my love affair with Asylum blogging. I've done inmate profiles - spotlights on Asylum personnel - and I've done pitches - shameless attempts to get hired in marketing/development - but now, I'm melding the best of these features into one, amalgamated column: the awkwardly-named Asylum Should-Stars, in which I present actors/actresses/other cultural figures I think would make lovely additions to the Asylum's stable of performers. More mindless fun to wile away your workday! Let's dive right in, shall we?

Name: Keri Lynn Pratt

Best Known For: Cruel Intentions 2, The Smokers, A Single Man, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, various TV.

Usually Plays: straight-up good girls, naive beauties among treacherous, conniving others.

Could Be Cast As: for my money, Ms. Pratt is a sort of younger DeeDee Pfeiffer: beautiful, talented, sweet and sincere but with an underlying sassiness that needs to be brought to light. I see a brilliant but hare brained physicist, astronomer or geologist in her future.

Name: Michael Des Barres

Best Known For: playing MacGyver's nemesis Murdock, Sugar Town, "Melrose Place" and pretty much every show on network television in the 1980's; also a bitchin' rock star, in his day.

Usually Plays: with a mug like his, Des Barres typically inhabits the wealthy, megalomanical, evil-genius sort, or at least corrupt titans of industry.

Could Be Cast As: usually I like to suggest roles against the grain, but Des Barres is so good at what he does - being slickly, charmingly evil, that it would be a shame to change things up. There's a role for this guy in every Asylum movie, just plug him in and watch him go.

Name: Grace Zabriskie

Best Known For: "Twin Peaks," "Big Love," Wild at Heart, An Officer and a Gentleman

Usually Cast As: wiry older women, usually a bit crazy or malevolent, or both. No one does violently frazzled like Laura Palmer's mom.

Could Be Cast As: surely Mark Atkins has a fantasy epic planned in which she could play an aging queen or wicked sorceress. Or what about the backwoods mother of a serial killer, a kind of actual Mother Bates?

Sounds Like an Asylum Movie to Me

2011-12-19T08:09:00.000-08:00

The story here isn't so much the impetus for this post as much as the concept of the critter at the center of it is.

First Details on BATTLESHIPS...Now AMERICAN BATTLESHIP!

2011-12-16T16:48:00.000-08:00

Big day today, not only do we get Nazis at the Center of the Earth stills, now we have cast, crew and plot details for American Battleship!

We already knew the film was being directed by Thunder Levin, the writer behind this year's 200MPH, but now we know the story he's working with:

"When a fleet of mysterious ships wage war against the Earth, only the crew of the USS Iowa, the last American battleship, can prevent global armageddon."

Pretty cool plot, loosely tied in to the Peter Berg Battleship out this summer. The real cool stuff here is the casting; dig: Mario Van Peebles (New Jack City, bitches) and Carl Weathers (don't make me tell you), as well as JoHanna Watts, best know for Mutant Vampire Zombies From the 'Hood, also written and directed by Thunder Levin.

Side note, this one was filmed way across the country off the coast of my home state, North Carolina. I don't really have a point here - we have good battleship water? - I just wanted to shout out NC. Hold 'em, Heels.

Back to the matter at hand, all in all, this makes for a pretty rad action/sci-fi flick. Now all we have to do is wait until May 15th, 2012 to see it...

Holy Crap! First Stills From Nazis at the Center of the Earth!!!

2011-12-16T12:23:00.000-08:00

Oh happy, happy Friday! Seems everyone's favorite independent studio just wrapped production this week on what is sure to be one of 2012's most hotly-anticipated films, and a contender for best film title ever, Nazis at the Center of the Earth. Well, now we get a look at the first round of stills from the set, and man oh man oh man does this one look every bit as awesome as its promise.

The film stars Dominique Swain, Christopher Carl Johnson, Lilian Bowden, Josh Allen and the always wonderful Jake Busey, and is directed by first-time helmer and The Asylum's in-house VFX supervisor Joseph Lawson, from a script by Asylum producer Paul Bales, who also wrote Sherlock Holmes and 2010: Moby Dick.

So go, now, and dig on these excellent stills, then try not to pass out holding your breath for the film's release, April 24th, 2012.

My Nine Favorite (Non-Asylum) Films of 2011

2011-12-14T08:14:00.000-08:00

I do actually watch other movies, usually at least one a day, and some of them even spent time in a theater. So, in an effort to give you a broader sampling of my taste, I present My Nine Favorite (Non-Asylum) Films of 2011, in alphabetical order. Why only nine, you ask, why not ten? Truthfully, I don't watch a lot of current films, most of my viewing selections go back a few decades, so nine was all I could come up with. Here we go...

Attack the Block
written and directed by Joe Cornish

I don't typically go in for alien invasion stories, but this one gripped me from frame one; also has the most interesting internal vocabulary since A Clockwork Orange

Bellflower
written and directed by Evan Glodell

Like Before Sunrise for the amateur-flamethrowing/binge-drinking set. Glodell, who also stars, might be the most likable guy of the year; I wanna get totally wasted with this dude and blow shit up.

Drive Angry
written by Todd Farmer & Patrick Lussier
directed by Patrick Lussier

They don't make as many redneck/religio-thrillers like they did back in the 70's - Race the Devil etc - but thank god Todd Farmer fixed that; plus, the best sex scene since...well, since ever.

Drive
written by Hossein Amini based on the book by James Sallis
directed by Nicholas Winding Refn

There's no one cooler than Ryan Gosling this year, except maybe Nicholas Refn. This one's like a Jim Thompson story on meth, and it's got Albert Brooks. Albert Brooks!

Rise of the Planet of the Apes
written by Rick Jaffa & Amanda Silver
directed by Rupert Wyatt

I'm a big-time, life-long P.O.T.A. fan, and this revamp pumped fresh blood in the franchise and all but eliminated the nasty taste still lingering in my mouth from the whole Tim Burton-Marky Mark debacle. Intense, cerebral, touching, and this from a guy who hates James Franco.

Rubber
written and directed by Quentin Dupieux

This one makes no apologies for what it is: a totally absurd, illogical and hella fun monster movie. But the monster's, you know, an old tire. If I was this inventive, I'd never leave the house.

Super 8
written and directed by J.J. Abrams

This is the sort of movie that if it had come out when I was 10 or 11, it would have changed my life. As it is, this might be the most fun my brain had with a movie this year. Pure spectacle on every level, and it works.

Super
written and directed by James Gunn

Not only is this a brilliant, real-life take on the superhero movie craze, it's also, oddly enough, one of the most touching and endearing films I saw in 2011. Rainn Wilson is more than just a funnyman, he is a titan, and James Gunn is a fucking rock star in my book.

Tucker and Dale vs. Evil
written by Eli Craig & Morgan Jurgenson
directed by Eli Craig

Funny as hell, inventive as all get out, strangely sweet and acted with aplomb by the super-hilarious Alan Tudyk and Tyler Labine. I for one am hoping this is part one of a franchise.

So there you have it, and don't worry, my Asylum favorites of 2011 are coming before the year ends...

The Asylum on SyFy December/January

2011-12-13T08:14:00.000-08:00

With the shortage of video stores in our country at present, locating older Asylum titles on DVD without buying them can be kinda tricky. Fortunately for us, we have the SyFy network, which is constantly scheduling one Asylum flick or another, including many of the studio's staples, those older films that helped pave the way for the triumphant productions they're unleashing these days. Below, please find a schedule of Asylum movies on SyFy for the rest of this month, and next month, including an all-Asylum afternoon triple feature on January 22nd, a Sunday. This isn't a post I make often, and if ever you're curious as to what if any Asylum films will be gracing the small screen soon, jump over to The Asylum's website, where they always have a schedule up on the right side of their homepage. All times are Eastern Standard. Happy viewing!

Titanic II Thurs, 12/15, 3am

100 Feet   Thurs./Fri. 12/29&30 5pm/3am

2012: Supernova   Sat., 1/14, 9am

100 Feet Tues., 1.17, 11am

Journey to the Center of the Earth   Sun., 1/22, 1pm

100 Million BC   Sun., 1/22, 3pm

The Land That Time Forgot   Sun., 1/22, 5pm

100 Million BC   Mon., 1/23, 12am

Princess of Mars   Thurs., 1/26, 3am

Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus   Fri./Sat., 1/27&28, 2pm/3am

MegaFault   Sat., 1/28, 1pm

COMMITTED EXCLUSIVE: A Look at the Opening VFX for GRIMM'S SNOW WHITE!!!

2011-12-09T13:28:00.000-08:00

There are still two Asylum films slated for release in 2011 - Zombie Apocalypse and Amityville Haunting - but already the studio's 2012 slate is filling up quick: 2 Headed Shark Attack, Air Collision, Celebrity Sex Tape, Nazis at the Center of the Earth and Battleships are already in production or in post. But the film I think a lot of people are super-excited for is Grimm's Snow White, a creepier, more creature-centric look at one of the world's most homogenized (and thus in dire need of a reworking such as this) fairy tales.

In the plot description, "ferocious reptile beasts" are said to play a major role and now, courtesy of the fine, fine folks over at The Asylum, I have a very brief clip of the film's opening VFX sequence. Dig it:

Pretty, pretty, pretty rad stuff here. That thing looks like a mega-komodo (TM) with a longer, more versatile neck. Joseph Lawson - who is directing for the first tome in 2012, Nazis at the Center of the Earth - and The Asylum's VFX team have been blowing it up this year. I know I say that every opportunity I get, so if it's getting old, too bad, because the team just keeps giving me opportunities. With a script by Naomi Selfman (MSvC, MPvG), direction from Rachel Goldenberg (Sherlock Holmes) and visual effects like these, you can bet this is not your little sister's Snow White.

The film hits DVD on February 28th, 2012. Try and wait best you can.

What's the Matter, People? You Don't Want MEGA SHARK 3?!?!?!?

2011-12-09T10:51:00.000-08:00

If ever there was a time that we faithfully-committed needed to come together and unify our voices, it is now.

Almost a month ago, The Asylum threw down a simple but AMAZING gauntlet: if their Twitter account hit 3,000 followers by December 31st, 2011, they would greenlight MEGA SHARK 3 for production. MEGA SHARK 3. As an Asylum fan, there should be no sweeter three-word phrase in this or any other language.

At present, however, their follower count stands at only 1,246, which is 1,754 followers away from our 3K goal, and we have only 22 days left to hit it.

So take to the web, dear friends, blow up your own Twitter accounts, your Facebooks, your Google+'s, your blogs and webpages, message boards, forums, wherever you go online where there are other people, you need to let them know to follow The Asylum and help bring about the greatest third-installment to a shark franchise ever (sorry Jaws 3D). And don't stop at the web. Back in the day, we used to talk to people face-to-face, and though out-dated, you still have the technology to do so. Tell your neighbors, your mailman, your grocer, your in-laws, that dick at work, your bartender, definitely your weed-dealer, people walking their dogs or pushing babies, anyone with ears and a computer.

This is a rare and spectacular opportunity; are we just going to sit around idly and let it pass us by? HELL NO.

You got two options, as I see it: you can spread this post and it's call to duty like you would Mononucleosis at a high-school make-out party and help contribute to what is easily one of the most important cultural movements of our generation, or you can sit on your ass and let other companies make crappy shark movies to fill that deep, black void inside you. Which sounds better, Cheeto-fingers?

As a special incentive - and I don't know if you'll think it's special, but I would, if it wasn't about me - if The Asylum does hit 3K followers by 12/31/11, I'll select one of those followers at random and mail you an autographed copy (autographed by me, unfortunately, so the resale value is nil) of 2 Headed Shark Attack when it comes out on DVD at the end of January. Just think! A copy of the greatest 2-headed anything film ever autographed by a low-level contributor! How B-awesome is that?

22 days. 1,700+ followers. Let's get at it, team.

A Look at the Cast of 2 Headed Shark Attack

2011-12-07T08:13:00.000-08:00

With only two Asylum films yet to be released in 2011 - the found-footage mystery-project The Amityville Haunting and the already-aired Zombie Apocalypse - I thought it apt to take a look ahead to the first of the studio's 2012 slate, the destined-for-greatness 2 Headed Shark Attack.

The film, directed by Christopher Ray (Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus, Almighty Thor) from a story by Edward DeRuiter (3 Musketeers) and a script from yours truly (A Haunting in Salem), boasts a triumvirate of talents in the leads - Carmen Electra, Brooke Hogan and Charlie O'Connell. I've previously made note of their and a couple others' qualifications, but as this is a BIG cast, there are a lot of people left to highlight. So here's the latest crop of actors set to portray the unfortunate lot of semester-at-sea-students run afoul of nature's most vicious mistake, the 2-headed shark.

Actor Geoff Ward will tackle the role of "Cole," the strong, popular sort. A South Florida native, Ward has been acting on film since 2004, appearing in such projects as Dark Queen, Bachelor Party 2: The Last Temptation and TV series "The Glades."

Anthony E. Valentin plays "Dakilla," one of two Filipino crew members (the other being Gerald Webb's "Han."). Valentin has also been appearing on screen since 2004, The Fiesta Grand, Fast Food and an episode of "Burn Notice" among his credits.

In the role of "Alex" is actor Benjamin James. 2 Headed Shark Attack looks to be his first feature, but he was worked in television, appearing in the programs "Magic City" and "Wicked Attraction."

Michael Dicarluccio shall inhabit the character of "Ethan." This is also Dicarluccio's first feature, though not his first credits; he has previous appeared as himself in the documentary short Consequences, and as an actor in the short I'm Still On Probation, Remember?

And then there is a quartet of brand-newbies, actors making their first credited appearance on screen: Lauren Vera, Tihirah Taliaferro, Casey King Leslie and Marckenson Charles. Lucky kids these, starting their careers on a film sure to become a cult classic.

Might still be a name or two out there waiting to be revealed, but for the most part, these guys, added to all the others, make the core 20 characters in 2 Headed Shark Attack. That's a lot of bait. See for yourself how it goes down when 2 Headed Shark Attack hits DVD on January 31st of next year.