observation notes: BIKINI SPRING BREAK

There would be some who might say the spring break movie is a well-trod and well-mined sub-genre of teen sex comedies, and that nothing new can be found there. To those people may I direct you to The Asylum's Bikini Spring Break, on DVD now, which manages to not only breathe new life into the category, but also manages a few new tricks along the way.

First things first, the plot: "A group of coeds from a small conservative college break out of their shells when their marching band bus breaks down in Ft. Lauderdale during Spring Break."

Simple enough, right? The best things in life are. Now, in the interest of remaining spoiler-free, I won't delve into plot specifics, other than to say BSB hits all the right notes. You have to wait perhaps 2.7 seconds for the first wave of nudity, which I believe might be a new Asylum record. Already things are off to a stellar start. 

The film is laced with inventive gags that reaffirm everything society prays is true about buxom college girls: they love to be naked, especially in the company of each other, and are itching for sexual experimentation. There's a real 80's sex-comedy vibe running through this, updated for today's raunchier standards, and it helps to create an endearing cast of characters you don't just want to see naked, you also want to see them triumph. BSB is like an actually-good American Pie sequel, or Revenge of the Nerds 2: Nerds in Paradise with female main characters (which, all apologies to the excellent Robert Carradine, woulda been cooler). And it has perhaps the greatest jello wrestling scene in all of cinema, shot in stunning slo-mo that reveals the beauty within the brutality of it all.

As for that endearing cast of characters, while all of the women are near-perfect for their roles - Samantha Stewart as the bossy, neurotic, hotter "Jessie-Spano" type "Whitney," Virginia Petrucci as the doe-eyed and bawdily naive "Zoe," Jamie Noel as spoiled-princess type "Franny" (nice Salinger nod), Erin O'Brien as the abrupt and gruff "Michelle" and Rachel Alig as blissfully daft, sweet-as-sugar "Alice" - it's Alig, for me at least, that really stood out; it's a funny role and she's funny in it, admittedly funnier than I was expecting. Other standouts in supporting roles include Erica Duke as the anti-spring break good girl "Constance" and Johnathan Nation as the pitch-perfect exasperated dean of the girls' community college. There's also a handsome mechanic to watch out for.


All in all then, writer/director Jared Cohn has turned in another fine effort: BSB is smarter than your average sex comedy, its tongue firmly in cheek, ripe with loveable characters and rife with scintillating scenarios that will keep fans of the genre - and of beautiful women - more than transfixed. Utterly rewatchable. Who knows, maybe this could become The Asylum's first comedy franchise? I'd watch six more of these.


Bikini Spring Break  is on DVD right this instant. Go get it.